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Evanescent Songs and Broken Keys..I gave it up...
The image I'd fought so hard to keep
The image I created to hide from you
Surrounded by so much sex..
So many lies...
I fell away from you...
Singing that sweet song of memory
Praying for eternal forgiveness,
For having lost your hear, so long ago
But did I deserve it?
To fall back into your arms..
It would only be a heavenly dream
One, where I;d be lost in your eyes forever
Until in return, you broke my spirit..
My soul wasting away
Through your fingers and into the dirt
I fell to my knees, wondering..
Had you lost the key to my heart, too?
Did you walk away from the imperfections?
Yes...the perfection of imperfection...
Had we not realized it?
Had we not realized..
The love we made was of passionate discourse
When our hearts and bodies fell into place
Wrapped in each others arms..
We fell into mindless esctasy...
The night we created that key of eternal love..
Never Go BackNever go back
Never hold it in, to kill you faster
Let it breathe...
Believe you can be everything
Realize you can feel anything
How can I have forgotten about you, baby?
Your seductive stare?
How submissive I became at the sight of your lips touching my skin...
How can I feel such chainless freedom now?
To be able to explore the possiblities
Without you pulling me back...
.....so far down into the abyss.
Where do I come back to?
This unimaginable loniness?
Into a place were I feel weightless.
Alone and yet...
I do not know.
I WILL NEVER...."I will never...."
"I can never...."
"I swear I'd never...."
The word,never, breathes it's lie into every conversation
Every aspect of human interaction
The word....the phrase
It stings the lips of all who repeat it an all who recieve it
It immediately closes our minds
And breakdown the very fabric of reality
What world can be trapped in such a dysfunctional existance?
"I'll NEVER truly know....."
The concept of 'never' is a never ending cycle of uncertainty
Used to sheild the emotions of those who weild it's power
"NEVER will I...."
Never will I tell you what say.
How to feel....
How to act....
How to live....
It's nt my place to make up your mind
Only to attempt to change it
"So you can NEVER...."
So you can understand...
So your head...
"....doesn't explode under the pressure."
"Because I NEVER...."
"....wanted this f
StreamlineUnderstand where my heart lies with you
Why this can not be forever
My heart can no longer hold the love of two
Playing this sick game of russian rulette with your heads
I cannot bare to inflict such pain on either of you
Hear me when I say there's only one rose let on the thorn
And it can't be split done the middle
As much as I'd lke it to be
As much as I've wished it were that easy
I know no sign will show me my path
Beyond the way of an empty flame
Or a hollow threat
How the stereotypical fantasy of a something-"charming"
It can never wisk you away into a happily ever after
Instead I'm trapped in this twisted romance
With the key a only a few feet away from the gates
My soul can never truly comprehend why it need come to this
This hellish cold
This paradox of emotions traveling deep within me
Held together by the loves of spirits
I long for solice
But deep inside I can't let them both go
Each one filling in an empty space in my soul
Letting go in the moment....
Breathe Forever MoreI quite enjoy the chaos
That strange desire for my heart to skip a beat
Falling into that unusual pit of silence
That soothing silence
That feeling of peace
Oblivious to the world
What a unique beauty you seem to be
And I must admit it's something I never realized
What I began to live for
This sudden change of pace leaves me caught in your eyes
Locked away in your gaze
Slowly being dragged through that rabbit hole again
And I have no desire to escape
No efforts to find what was once my reality
To keep the dream alive
To keep myself enchained to an enchanted slumber
A sweet sacrificial heart beats slowly to your hums
That beautiful melody
One wonderous harmony
As she sways in the wind
To admit such a thing would be painful
To admit such a desire would be such sweet release
Such undoubting rapture
To lose control.....just this one time.
Unanswered QuestionsI'm not myself when you're depressed.
Which is quite often when I think about it.
You stare into the skies with little passion in your eyes.
Humm with little color in your viens.
The kiss means so much less than it had before.
I try to aim for more passion to satisfy your sadness.
But as my tension builds, you seem to avoid my embrace.
Tell me why I can no longer fuel your broken spirit.
Why has everything come down to this moment?
When you needed me to come over and talk to you.
My heart could no longer take the pain of not knowing.
That I had lost who you were.
I was aware that I couldn't say that I'd loved you.
And how it felt like a deep mass in my stomach.
How I felt trapped amongst my feelings for you.
That lies were burning a whole through me.
At this point, it's easier not to say a word.
Think this will all pass and return to it's usual awkward state.
I hoped for some mode of secrecy between the two of us.
But in your eyes, I could see you wanted more.
Much more than
A message to the brokenYou drown yourself
in liquid sorrows,
letting the salty mess
burn your wounds,
and the sadness
to drip in your mouth,
consuming your words
and you say
you deserve the pain,
but I want to dry your face,
and whisper in your ear
how the clouds cry too,
while they hold such beauty,
and so do you.
It's Okay to be ImperfectThe moon
Stand Against SuicideI know the pain is perhaps unbearable,
But darling, please put down the blade.
Release your emotions through tears and smiles,
Rather than dreading these days.
Do it for the little girl, whose mother can’t be there,
Or for the boy whose father drank too much.
For the boy who can’t sit in elementary school,
Because the bruises from Daddy hurt to touch.
For the teenage girl lying face down in her bed,
Thinking, why can’t it all be done?
For the elderly man looking up at the stars,
Counting the days one by one.
Do it for the children who wonder, does it end?
For the ones who feel left on their own.
For the ones who think, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
If I didn’t feel so left alone.
And finally, do it for one other person,
The person in front of these words.
Because you’ll never know how it gets better
When focusing on pain and hurt.
Live one more day, dear, for them and for you,
And I swear to you, problems will fade.
I know, for right now, it’s p
Clear WristA clear wrist, barren of scars,
as opposed to skin sauntered in marks,
tells a trickier story than it's soiled and raw,
uncaring, unkempt counter part.
Bravery, I think it holds,
the strength to bare unimaginable loads
of pain and suffering through endless times,
and withstanding the agony of sleepless nights.
Some think it is fear, the reluctance to cut,
but I believe it opposite, it show courage and guts.
To bear your pain without a nick on your wrist,
is like a solider braving his terrain while being torn limb from limb.
Agonizing as it is, to hide your pain,
you do it so well, and no attention you'll gain.
At the end of the day, it's not cry for attention,
rather a cry for the victory that's silently mentioned.
Your scars are those not self inflicted,
and despite the gnawing intention,
to harm yourself and ease your pain,
the scars you earn are rightfully gained.
In a room of those who have jumped the gun,
and left traces of blood deep in their arms,
do not be tempted to do the sam
dark circlesi haven't slept well in 14 days
my eyes droop pretty colors
'50 shades of purple and grey,
they're bags and they're designer'
making jokes is how i cope
with chapped lips and constant chap-stick
it tastes like honey and mint
i laugh and say i'm addicted.
hooded lids and sleepy smiles
during lunch at subway
my friends ask if I'm okay
I say that I'm just tired.
but really when I see him with her
my heart sinks to the tiles
she's pretty and witty and sure as hell she can sing
and i'm just a loud bone-collector.
when I see her with him,
dancing and laughing and grinning,
the ring on her finger
laughs at my singularity.
for as much as i lie and as much as i try
my loneliness still creeps in,
because no matter how much they protest,
i'm still the lowly fifth-wheel.
walking behind them on sidewalks
that are wide, but built for four
smiles and laughs when they look back
but the frown creeps evermore.
pelvis peaks through paper-thin skin
and knuckles white and pale
my ribs are empty, my bo
I Thought I Needed FeminismI thought I needed feminism, when I was a little girl.
And I am very sad to admit, that this wasn't very long ago.
I thought when he held the door open for me, that he was making a big mistake.
That he was being a pompous ass, and he took my strength for a fake.
And when he offered to pay my tab, I still called him an ass.
Because I thought he assumed I was poor, and below middle class.
Or when his hard work earned him a promotion,
yet I did nothing, and the boss' ignorance to promote me, I believed was a sexist notion.
My friend really wanted feminism when she found her ex-dead drunk,
removed his clothes, and without his consent, had a pleasurable fuck.
When her parents bust into the room unexpected that night,
she said he raped her, and he was arrested without so much as a fight.
Perhaps feminism was there when I walked out into the street in pure nudity,
and shouted the my neighbors “You have no right to judge me!”
I didn't care about the children who were standing in th
ParalyzedBehind the walls lay its fire
Beautifully frozen in time
Under the moonlight nights love blooms
Slowly sucking the light out of the room
A silent lullaby she sings
Softly, her voice captures the air
Leaving only her beauty to descend upon me
Broken through the shallow black
Stealing her pain
Her darkened hair flows with the wind
Together, dancing in the breeze
Breathe once again
She hums her healing melody
No longer alone
She sits in the quite
Remembering the echoes of loss
As dawn approaches
And dusk fades into memory
She remembers to sing into the morning
The door unlocks
Leading into her emotional freedom
A heavy heart seases to worry
Breathing in peace once again
A Bloody, Stupid Miracle The day we’d cured the human condition was the day I put a bullet through my head and didn’t die. It was also the day I realized how scared I actually was of death, and after hours of muscle ache from holding that gauze against my open skull, after the wound closed and everything went back to normal, I had myself a good old-fashioned brainstorm. How ironic.
But when summer came, everything had fallen to shit. The air scorched my skin and parched my tongue every time I took a breath. The sun glared down on a rapidly-collapsing world, full of the undying bastard children of cruelty and misfortune. What was one to do when their cells regenerated faster than they decomposed?
My feet hit the pavement, now littered with jagged bits of glass to snap at my toes, thoroughly baked by the blazing ball of bitter disdain high overhead. Today was worse than yesterday. Though I’d often wondered the purpose of it anymore, I
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